Freedom

It’s been a long time since i’ve written a diary entry on my site, I think since coming back from my four month travel expedition I’ve been so busy with ‘life’ in general, I haven’t really allowed my self time to reflect and write.

I have been through a very perplexing month in view of my life choices. I’m nearly twenty and although I am very aware that I am still young, I’ve been stumbling on choices that will lead me to different adventures and it’s been to hard to pin point what I really want. I’ve always wanted to study English Literature and Language at some point in my life. I’ve known that for a while, but since being back home I’ve just wanted to run off to different countries and have crazy adventures. With a lot of deliberation I came up with ideas like studying in Australia, or working in New Zealand for a year by myself. However in reality – I need to go to university.

I have a placement at Bath Spa university which starts in September. I worked so hard to achieve my A-Levels to get this place and I nearly threw it all away for another country. What I never realised was that I don’t HAVE to go on the other side of the world to get the relaxation I am yearning after.
This was achieved by jetting off to Amsterdam for a quick few days away. My friend and I planned nothing, just bought some flights for £70. That money could have been spent on a train up to London let alone a flight to another country. Once I was there, my shoulders dropped and my smile came back. A very relaxed, happy state of mind I seem to only gain from travelling.

Why am I saying this? The point is, I’ve missed out on Europe. Europe is such a beautiful and diverse place that I completely dismissed. I don’t have to go on a twelve hour flight to the other side of the world to feel like I am travelling, I have the whole world on my door step. So with that, Eloise and I have booked another trip to Switzerland to see our travel buddies. I can’t wait! It’s amazing the motivation it gives you.

I’ve also stopped worrying about money twenty-four-seven. Let’s be honest, as long as you are not silly and use your money wisely (like paying bills ect) and keeping some aside, you really can do anything. You don’t have to have thousands to travel, just a couple of quid for flights, fun and trains really. Let’s be honest, if I’m surrounded by the mountains of Switzerland I hardly care if I have a pristine double en-suit bedroom. Give me a bed on a floor and I am happy!

Including Switzerland that’s 8 countries in 8 months (from January to August) Not bad eh?

Rose Crown

run little one run free

run fast and strong my daisy

spread your little petals

stamp and glide through the nettles

jump over the wild thorn

over meadows my sweet fawn

for the ring does not fit your finger

no more do these bad thoughts linger

the necklace snapped apon your skin

the chain links broken; metallic and tin

the guitar strings struck a familiar sound

flashing a hurt so deep, so round

stop, daisy! be careful of the rose crown

it’s led by dark raven’s and a goul’s frown

just run little one, run

don’t carry this pain, it’s neither fruit nor fun

my little cherry-cup, rouge butternut melody

don’t look behind you, run free

that face in the shadows behind the woods

does not carry wealth or flower goods

little pip grow to your hearts content

for that’s what the crown has sent

face forward towards the sun

because what has happened, is done

enough with the temptation my dove

run away flower, run away from love.

Midday Monday Memories 

Do you remember when you smiled at me across the bar?

Do you remember when you said “I will always be there, no matter how far?”

Do you remember when I hugged you and I said you smelt like coconut shampoo?

Do you remember when you said you loved me, but it wasn’t true?

I remember when your smile meant my day

I remember when your hands made  me at loss of words to say

I remember when you wiped tears from my eyes 

I remember when we never had to worry about deciet, fear or lies

I remember you.

Do you remember me too? 

Contours

Contours of hips and collarbone,
As morning’s hot sun sneaks
Her lackadaisical light to your skin tone,
A warm heart: an orange leak

Your smile so decalescent, searing
It’s memory impressed like a hot iron
Melting, cooling then nearing:
Roaring like he the alpha lion

Into the fragments of my fidelity,
The V so perfect a W so profound
Letters unobscured to clarity
Silence falls, there’s little sound

Two pairs of green eyes wearily close
Body burrowed to a chest
Of contours so sweet she chose
And their dazed day, laid to rest.

Maroon Temple

The single full rouge glass:
Matched with crowed substances
Blurred unclasped brass,
Statues of two ghost’s absences
Soul littered from a single letter –
A character contrived of a brushstroke
An art so sweet for the better
Of our hearts entwined around an ancient oak.
This isn’t denial it’s merely nature
Aid me Mother for my heart has crumbled
He is not lost: but I am so
A forfeit of a maroon wine, humbled
Like a dandelion in the grass left to grow;
Your tongue conscious of my name
The letter’s languish a Lillie,
Which wilt at your way of honeyed flame

Sir your careless, beautiful, and wandering act
Has captured my fingertips,
Knitted into capsules of your true fact
Yet again I write of an unknown script,
Unsure of where this may lead
A facade of muddled eight lined stanzas
Will you ever know that I agreed –
That your hinderance holds my hidden answers

In the palm of your hands,
In the knuckles of my knowing
In the man-made broken sands,
In the stem of the flower that is growing
In the deep dark liquid of a ship’s mast,
In the maroon temple of a girl’s past
In this single full rouge glass.

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